I went back to work on last Monday. I don't know why I wanted to go back, other than I like the people I work with and I miss my job, but it is just delaying the inevitable. PLUS, it was getting expensive for me to be at home. I kept finding projects that I wanted to do around the house and none of them were cheap. Going back for three weeks will not help me keep my job after transplant. I will be out too long. :( It was hard sharing my desk, computer, etc with the temp. It feels like and invasion of personal space and, even though she is very nice, it is hard not to resent her being here.
I found out Wednesday I am going to transplant on March 7. Even though this is what I have been waiting for, I am terrified. Jason and I met with Dr. Koneca and she mapped out the possible problem that I may encounter including severe gut problems from diarrhea to mouth sores, to being unable to eat and drink for weeks. This is all related to the marrow vs host disease. However, the marrow vs host disease can kill any remaining leukemia. So here is what I am hoping for: there is what they call marrow vs leukemia which is a mild form of the above disease. I what just enough for the marrow to be affective in fighting this crap, but not enough to make me very ill. Is that asking too much? Naw, I don't think so.
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